984. You Can’t Change Anyone


Winds of Change

You can’t change anyone. 

by Dave Bocking

The day to day interactions we have with people are sometimes good, sometimes bad. One of the more unproductive mindsets we can have during these interactions is that we can have an effect on what the other person thinks.

I spent many years wondering “why doesn’t this person like me?” and “why do they treat others badly?”. What I found was that focusing on the “WHY” was incredibly draining and utterly pointless.

Someone once said,

“Worrying is like sitting in a rocking chair. It’ll give you something to do for awhile but it won’t get you anywhere.”

The same can be said for trying to change others.

I learned that the only “ACTIONS” I can control are my own. I can try for years and years to change someone else’s way of thinking but they have their own world, their own past, and their own goals… none of which have anything to do with me or MY ideas.

So… if you ever find yourself in a situation with another person which doesn’t quite sit well with you, remember that you can’t control that persons way of thinking or the way they act. You can only control the way you act or react. When I figured this out, day to day life became so much less stressful and that much more enjoyable. I was also able to focus  much more of my energy on my own goals, with less worry about what others were doing.

Always look within yourself.

Dave recommends reading “The Mastery of Love” by Don Miguel Ruiz, which speaks about relationships and how you need to love someone unconditionally for everything they are. If you’re with someone, and you want to change something about them, you will find yourself more in “hell” than in “heaven”. Click the link above to buy the book now.

[author] [author_image timthumb=’on’]http://1000lifelessons.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/davebocking-e1312740851321.jpg[/author_image] [author_info]Dave Bocking lives in Guelph, Onterio. He spends most of his time traveling, learning, and experiencing life to its fullest. You can connect with Dave on Facebook by searching David Bocking.[/author_info] [/author]